top of page

“I’m Not Angry!”: Building Emotional Awareness and Connecting to Anger

  • Writer:  Lauren Fallat, LPC LPAT ATR-BC
    Lauren Fallat, LPC LPAT ATR-BC
  • Dec 20, 2023
  • 3 min read

Updated: Mar 23


Woman with red hair, wearing a striped shirt, screams with hands raised. Red nail polish. White background. Expresses anger or frustration.

“I’m Not Angry!”: Building Emotional Awareness and Connecting to Anger

 

The challenge of recognizing or experiencing anger is a complex phenomenon with roots in diverse psychological, cultural, and individual factors.  Unveiling the intricacies of recognizing and experiencing anger requires an exploration of the diverse elements that contribute to this phenomenon. From deeply rooted psychological dynamics to the impact of cultural norms, understanding the complexities of anger sheds light on the intricacies of human emotion.

 

On a psychological level, individuals may struggle with emotional awareness or possess deeply ingrained coping mechanisms that divert attention from the recognition of anger.  Emotional awareness involves the ability to recognize and understand one’s own feelings. Some individuals may find it challenging to connect with their emotions due to various reasons such as past traumas, learned behaviors, or an overall lack of mindfulness. In cases where individuals have developed defensive coping mechanisms, these strategies may act as protective barriers, allowing them to avoid or suppress anger as a way of managing perceived threats or uncomfortable situations.

 

For instance, a person who learned early in life that expressing anger led to negative consequences may have developed a coping mechanism of immediately suppressing or redirecting this emotion. This learned behavior becomes deeply ingrained over time, making it automatic and challenging to override. Consequently, when faced with situations that would typically evoke anger, the individual might unconsciously employ these coping mechanisms, hindering their ability to recognize and appropriately address the emotion.


“I’m Not Angry” as Denial or Avoidance

Moreover, individuals with a history of using avoidance or denial as coping mechanisms may find it difficult to confront anger directly. These mechanisms serve as protective shields, shielding them from the discomfort associated with acknowledging and expressing anger. The challenge, then, lies in unraveling these ingrained patterns, fostering a heightened awareness of emotions, and developing healthier coping strategies that allow for the constructive recognition and expression of anger when appropriate. In therapeutic settings, individuals can work towards unraveling these psychological intricacies, fostering a more nuanced understanding of their emotional landscape.


Cultural Factors

Cultural influences also play a significant role, as societal norms and familial upbringing can shape one’s perception of emotions, particularly negative ones like anger. In environments where expressing anger is discouraged or deemed unacceptable, individuals may learn to suppress or repress this emotion, contributing to a diminished ability to identify it when it arises. In environments where the expression of anger is discouraged or labeled as unacceptable, individuals often internalize these cultural messages, learning to suppress or repress the emotion as a means of conforming to societal expectations. 

 

The repercussions of such conditioning extend beyond mere behavioral compliance, as they infiltrate the very fabric of emotional awareness. In such cultural contexts, individuals may find themselves grappling with a diminished ability to identify and articulate their anger when it surfaces, inadvertently fostering an emotional landscape where the authentic expression of this powerful emotion becomes elusive. This interplay between cultural conditioning and emotional suppression underscores the critical importance of cultural awareness and sensitivity in unraveling the complexities surrounding the recognition and experience of anger.


When to Seek Professional Help

If you or someone you know is struggling to identify or connect with feelings of anger, it may be helpful to consider seeking support from a mental health professional. A trained therapist can provide a safe and confidential space to explore and understand these emotions, uncovering underlying causes and patterns. Additionally, practicing mindfulness and self-reflection techniques can enhance emotional awareness, allowing for a more conscious recognition of anger when it arises.


To Schedule an Appointment

To schedule an appointment, click on the Book Now button. There you will see our availability for the next two months. You can select the day and time that works best for you. We look forward to being of assistance and will do our very best to help. To learn more About Us: About Us Visit our Art Therapy website to learn more about how Art Therapy can help you or a loved one cope with a wide range of issues: https://www.arttherapynj.com/. Read our latest blog here: https://www.arttherapynj.com/blog

bottom of page